


Sounds and Sensations

by EyesOfEnigma



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Blind main character, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut?, F/M, Feelings will happen, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, MC is called Mina Choi, Mina Choi (MC) is married to 707, OC is not MC, POV Third Person, Post 707 route, Romance, V is not around, choose your own adventure sort of thing, fluffy fluffy, sorta?, spoilers for 707 route, spoilers for 707's real name, tags added as we go, vote fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-08-31
Packaged: 2019-03-18 02:43:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,750
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13672599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EyesOfEnigma/pseuds/EyesOfEnigma
Summary: Joung Nari is a young blind musician studying professional violin at SKY University.  She's been friends with Mina Choi for over six months, learning slowly about the party planner's hectic but happy life, her silly husband, and her peculiar friends. Finally meeting these friends for the first time, Nari discovers a unique fondness for someone who sees her for more than just a person to pity.** Temporary Haitus **





	1. Chapter one: The Beginning (vote below)

**Author's Note:**

> HEY READERS:
> 
> This is a choose your own adventure-type thing. After reading the first chapter, vote below in the comments which romance option you want for this OFC! I'm sorry that V and 707 are not options, but I like the Post 707 route environment.
> 
> Thanks.

The elevator chimed cheerfully as it reached the top floor, and the doors slid gracefully apart with gentle mechanical protest.

Everything was so smooth, so sleek—every sound, every surface, every scent.  It reeked of quality, and, well . . . money.  Mina had warned her (or perhaps prepared) that her friend Mr. Han was a wealthy businessman not afraid to show his guests comfort and class in every sense of the word.  Don’t be stubborn with unnecessary modesty, she said, he won’t stand for it.

“After you,” the long-haired brunette offered politely, her bracelets audible as she gestured forward.  “Or should I say, after Mai,” she giggled.

The guest grinned as her lovely black Labrador pulled her kindly forward, comfortably leading her into the unknown.  “I really do appreciate Mr. Han allowing her into his home.  I could’ve managed with just my stick,” she insisted.

“Nonsense! He’d never separate someone from their good-natured furry companion.  He was especially pleased to hear Mai is friendly with cats,” Mina mused, pacing beside the pair as a guideline through the top floor.  “Here we are! Just on the right.  I’ll try to make sure they don’t overwhelm you all at once.”

“Thanks. C’mon, Mai.  Follow Mina,” she cooed, readying herself for a lot of hellos and such.  She had already met her friend’s goofy husband Saeyoung and his brother Saeran (albeit briefly for the latter), but apparently the RFA crew was a bit bigger and occasionally louder than that.  _It’ll be fine, stop worrying._

The door opened, and the inside chatter slipped out happily with animated voices and laughter.  It died down a bit as some lifted their gazes to the newest arrivals.  Mai’s tail wagged excitedly at the new sights and smells and sounds.

“Babe!” cried Saeyoung, shooting up from the large plush couch and practically skipping over to his wife with a huge grin.

“Miss me already?” Mina laughed, giving him a chaste kiss.  Several new voices greeted her also, causing her impish friend to idle awkwardly behind her.  “You remember Nari, right, love?”

“Of course!” he exclaimed cheerfully, giving her a sweet smile.  “And Mai, the fluffy puppy!” He stooped to shower the poor animal with a fair bit of attention that they both enjoyed far too much.

While he was busy, Mina took the reigns of the conversation. “Everyone, this is my friend, Joung Nari.”

Nari bowed politely in greeting, her feathered pixie cut waving slightly as she did so.  “It’s a pleasure to meet you all.”

They all chirped in unison how nice it was to meet her, and Mr. Han invited her to join them on the extravagant sofa.  Nari could hear him lift up gracefully from his seat, and she nervously seized Mina’s elbow for guidance to a comfortable spot.  Mai and Saeyoung followed their respective partners loyally, and while the others returned to peaceful conversation, everyone was seamlessly settled.  The large sofa was surprisingly firm, which was a relief for Nari, who didn’t want to be swallowed by a marshmallow of a piece of furniture. She listened carefully as Mina struck up conversation with another woman to her left.

“Excuse me, Miss Joung,” began a soft tenor voice. His tone was so kind and almost naïve, setting her at ease a bit more.  “Mina said you attend SKY University, but wouldn’t say much else.  Something about a ‘surprise’? What do you study?”

“I’m in my third year of classical and contemporary music, thank you for asking,” Nari replied quickly, “and I’m studying to be a professional violinist.”

“How impressive,” a woman of the left noted.  “How long have you played the violin, Miss Joung?”

“Since I was about five.  I’m twenty-two now, so it’s been a while.” Nari paused. “Sorry, Mina, could I hear everyone’s voices and names to remember it all?”

The young wife softly snorted with a bit of laughter. Nari knew her long enough to know she was laughing at herself, not her friend. “Yes, I’m so sorry.  Of course we can do that.”

“I’ll do it,” Saeyoung butt in.  “Hey, Zen, shut up.”

The light chatter ceased, and Nari felt heat creep into her cheeks.

“You’re so obnoxious,” Saeran muttered bitterly, but there was amusement hiding in his tone.

“ _Thank you_ , honey,” Mina said sarcastically. “This is a good time to bring up the surprise about Nari that I’ve been keeping a secret.”

“Come again?” Nari stuttered, very confused.  “I don’t have a lot to hide.”

“It’s more of an observation testing game,” Mina giggled. “Bear with me here, you’ll find it funny. Jumin knew about Mai ahead of time, but not why you need her.  Saeyoung and Saeran can’t participate, since they’ve met you before and know the secret.”

 _Ah_ , Nari thought.  _That’s where this is going.  Mina, you minx._

“It’s fairly obvious, isn’t it?” Saeran huffed.

“Don’t spoil it; I want to make sure everyone gets it,” Mina insisted, causing a smile from Nari. “But first, we’ll go around the circle and introduce ourselves, okay? Go ahead.”

Kang Jaehee was first, so calm and collected, respectful and almost a bit tired.  Mr. Han Jumin, a deep timbre and intelligent phrases.  Zen, at the other side of the circle, had a very smooth, flirtatious tone.  He couldn’t help but explain that he was an actor and it was his stage name.  Saeran and Saeyoung she new already, and Kim Yoosung was the young man who asked about her studies.

“Thank you, I’ll do my best to remember all your voices and names,” Nari assured, rubbing Mai behind the ears affectionately.

“Voices?” Jaehee asked quizzically, watching the dog receive attention for a few seconds. “Ah, I see.  I am in on your secret now, Mina.”

“Yes, it occurred to me also as soon as you stepped in,” Jumin stated. “Very clever, but I had the upper hand.”

“What are you talking about?!” Zen and Yoosung protested together.

Everyone simply smiled to themselves and waited.

“Wait!!” Yoosung burst, lifting out of the chair close by and waving a hand in front of Nari’s face.  Her eyes flicked, but not anywhere in the direction of his flailing.

“You know I can hear what you’re doing, sort of,” Nari grinned, sightless honey-brown eyes almost gleaming with amusement as they flickered pointlessly a bit.

“You’re _blind_ ,” Zen gasped in disbelief.  “I had no idea! I thought your dog was for epilepsy.”

“A fair assumption,” Nari replied.  “It’s alright, I’m not offended.”

“Honestly, she doesn’t look anybody directly,” Saeran pointed out. “How did you miss that?”

Zen huffed. “I though it was shyness!”

“Also a fair assumption, I’m not very talkative,” Nari added.

“Seems like your charming good looks won’t work on her, Zen,” Yoosung mused, and Saeyoung snickered along with him.

“Zen’s charm expands beyond just good looks; he is a very talented young man,” Jaehee defended quickly.

Zen let out a musical laugh.  “Thanks, Jaehee.  You flatter me too much.”

“You don’t seem to mind,” Jumin quipped quietly.

“Hey—”

“Alright, alright.  Ladies, calm your tits,” Mina shushed, sprouting another smirk from Nari.  _There’s my good friend._ Her playful swearing placed everyone back into casual ease, allowing healthy conversations to flourish between them.

Yoosung was showering Nari with questions in earnest. “Do you know any other instruments?”

“I learned piano alongside violin, but dropped it when I was about thirteen to focus all my efforts on violin.  I also briefly learned the cello, but not enough to particularly professional,” she explained.  “For most students in my program, singing is also required, but I’m a bit of an amateur.”

“She’s lying, she’s a beautiful singer,” Mina butt in mischievously.

“You should sing with me sometime,” Zen cut across, listening in on the exchange.

“Maybe someday,” Nari decided, not cutting off the idea.  If there was one thing she would do with almost anyone without prejudice, it was music.

“How do you learn music from your classes?” Jahee inquired.  “By ear?”

“Mostly,” Nari returned, giving Mai another affectionate scratch. “I have braille scripts to refine during practice at home, but it is a lot of learning in class with the others.  I’ve become good enough at ear training to keep up.”

“Nonsense! She’s top of her class,” Mina insisted again, sticking her tongue out at her friend to tease.

“Hardly,” Nari sighed, “but thank you.”

“I’m sure she’s quite skilled,” Jumin agreed. “Perhaps you could perform for the next RFA party.  Only if you’re comfortable with it.  Mina has spoken highly of you for a few months.’

“I’ll think about it, thank you for offering.  Mina suggested something similar not long ago.”

“Heeeey!” Saeyoung interrupted playfully.  “We should play a drinking game after dinner! How often are we all together?”

“We’re all together and that’s the first thing you think of?” Mina scoffed.

“No! It was the seven-hundred-and-seventh thing I though of!”

“Ha-ha, very funny.”

“I’m not against it,” Zen announced, sounding fairly intrigued.

Jumin sighed. “We should ask Miss Joung if it is alright with her.”

Nari let out a puff of air like a laugh. “I don’t see why not.  I’m not getting destroyed tonight though, it’d be far too embarrassing.”

“Embarrassing how?” Saeran asked.

Mina glanced at Nari, who simply gave a shy smile and a small blush.  “She’s a very chatty drunk,” Mina said, closing the matter.

Jumin stood and straightened the rolled sleeves of his dark blue dress shirt. “Dinner, then?”

They all cheerfully agreed, standing to be lead to the dining room.  Yoosung, being the gentleman that he is, offered to take Nari by the arm to gently guide her with them.  She could tell he wasn’t much taller than her, and his arm felt slender and soft—he was very warm, she realized, and his soft tones and caring nature was incredibly comforting. Her thoughts briefly wandered to the conversation she had with Mina the night before. ‘I bet one of them will fall for you,’ she had teased. _Sure, Mina. He’ll have to think I’m worth all the extra effort._

Mai calmly followed suit, tail wagging contently as they all took their seats, Mina on Nari’s left and Yoosung on her right.  Mina had asked (commanded?) Jumin to make the dinner simple, only three courses, nothing too extravagant so Nari would feel at ease.  He was never one to disappoint.  The food was delicious and homey, and the service almost silent and unnoticeable.  Unbeknownst to Nari, the other guests were a little curious of how easily she ate without much assistance, but Mina shot them a stink eye if they were staring for too long.

Natural conversation resumed, though Nari found herself listening pleasantly along.  Most topics consisted of their jobs, their personal lives, and the upcoming RFA party. In the past eight or so months that she had known Mina, the parties had come up, and she had gleaned that they were fancy affairs with a variety of guests in order to raise money for mental health facilities, private art schools, and hospitals.  Mina had emails up to her eyes the last time she organized an event, and judging by how they were talking, there was another coming up soon.

Just as they finished the entrée, Yoosung muttered to Nari carefully so the others wouldn’t hear over their own discussions.  His voice was so kind and calm, but he did sound a little awkward, like he was afraid of what she would think of him. “I hope you’ll play for us at the next party.  I’d love to hear your music.”

Nari couldn’t help but give him a small smile.  “I think I will.  I’ll talk to Mina about it.”

He paused, sinking into her friendly and quietly expression. “You know—I hope I don’t offend you, but—your eyes are far too pretty to not be used.”

Nari blinked, trying to understand what he meant.  Then she giggled. “I’ll take that as a compliment.  But you know, I think I do use my eyes,” she said.

“Oh?” Yoosung asked, curiosity heightening his voice.

“I use them for giving people like you something nice to look at,” she returned.

Yoosung blushed wildly, completely at a loss for words.  Mina pulled Nari adrift into a different discussion, leaving him to silently consider her words.

Dessert was light and freshly sweet, and soon after the group slowly sauntered back to the comfy seats of the living room.  Jumin had acquired Nari by the arm (to Yoosung’s mild displeasure) to ask her a few getting-to-know-you questions as they walked back behind the others, Mai loyally by their heels.  His skin was cold and smooth where she held his bare forearm, and his voice had a gravity to the low stoic tones she wasn’t used to.  She wasn’t frightened, however; in fact, the atmosphere around him reminded her of the American play _The Phantom of the Opera._

“Tell me, what sorts of hobbies do you enjoy?” he asked with genuine interest.  “Mina has not revealed much about you despite us often seeing your name in the RFA group chat.”

“Well, I spend a lot of my time reading.  Books on music or fantasy novels.  I’ve even tried my hand at writing a bit, but I think I won’t really produce anything good beyond amateur poetry,” Nari replied, slightly embarrassed.  He had a strange way of getting her to say more than she originally intended.  “And of course, I listen to music. There's a lot to learn from different styles in different countries.”

“Do you dance at all?” he asked.

She let out a laugh like a soft pop. “What brought that up?”

“If you ever attend one of the parties, it would be a shame to miss out,” he explained.

“Well, yes, I can dance, though not especially gracefully,” she admitted.

“You will simply need an excellent lead.”

“Is that an offer?” Nari challenged, feeling him slow by the couch in the living room as the others continued to chat.  Jumin waited until she was settled to take the sofa chair beside her to continue.

“I suppose it is, Miss Joung.” The way he said her surname gave her an inexplicable chill, but she ignored it.  _Okay, let’s play your game_.  She swallowed hard, pushing down the sudden heavy pit of anxiety.

“And what of your hobbies, Mr. Han?”

He chuckled, throwing her off a bit.  “Please, Jumin.”

She smirked.  “Only if you call me Nari, Jumin,” Nari said with timid softness.

He smiled knowingly in return, though she couldn’t see it.  “I also enjoy reading, though I have a particular fondness for historical fiction.  My childhood friend was a photographer, so I find myself in galleries more often than I probably should be.  I own some vineyards and manage them a bit, but it’s on a very small scale.”

“Ah! There’s something I agree with, I love going to art galleries, believe it or not,” Nari said.  Sensing his confusion, she continued: “I usually go with a close friend or my mother, and they describe the pieces to me.”

“But . . . do you know colour? Shape?” he asked, his tone thick with intrigue.

“No, not really, but I understand how colours make people feel.  How shadows and light work, in principle.  It’s true, I can’t _experience_ an art work, but I can understand how others do.  I really enjoy that.”

“How does your mother describe it?  How did she teach you?”

Nari smiled fondly at the memories.  “She knew that sound and touch would be my sight.  She tells me the subject, the colours, how they interact, how they harmonize like music.”  She paused, and, eager to help Jumin understand and in a burst of courage, held out her hands to him.  “Let me show you.”

Jumin carefully placed his slender pale hand in hers, and she spread his palm open slowly, her finger tracing outlines on his cool skin.  With determination greater than the underlying embarrassment, she silently observed how steady and soft the sensation was.

“The weight of her fingers showed me the weight of the shadows, like the deep thrums of a cello or a baritone.  I could feel the pattern, the rhythm of her touch, and form my own feeling as a combination of her understanding and mine.”

For a moment, they stilled in contemplation, and Nari felt his hand begin to grow warm in her gently grasp.          

“Extraordinary,” he sighed. “Your mother must have loved you very much to go to such lengths to help you learn as much as possible.”

Nari’s heart leapt out at the words.  “Yes . . . I’m—I’m eternally grateful to her.”

Their hands slid away from each other somewhat awkwardly, leaving them to listen to the others converse cheerfully.  Saeyoung took the opportunity to remind them of his grand plan.

“Jumin! Where’s the booze?”

The businessman sighed.  “What kind did you have in mind?”

“Not wine,” Saeran decided quickly.

“Perhaps a mix of hard liquor and something sweet to make the game a bit easier on the throat,” Jaehee suggested meekly.

Zen laughed musically. “You want to get a lot back, Jaehee?”

The young woman adjusted her glasses.  “Just thinking ahead.”

Jumin stood slowly.  “I’ll arrange for something, then, shall I?”

“I’ll help suggest a few things,” Mina pounced, lifting off the couch to follow.  Nari raised a brow at that, but she knew what was going on.  Mina wanted her to socialize without her. _Yay._

Lucky for her, Jaehee immediately picked up the slack. “So, Nari, what do you wish to pursue after you complete your education?”

“I hope to play in an orchestra, but it might be a little too ambitious,” she admitted, internally humbling herself at the unlikely chances of achieving such a dream.

Jaehee’s voice seemed to shake a bit as she sweetly reassured her.  “No, I’m sure you could do anything you put your mind to.”

Nari’s heart skipped a beat and a heat rose in her cheeks. It was such a genuine compliment, like Jaehee was rooting for her as an encouraging presence in the wings of the stage.  “Thank you . . .” There was a slight uncomfortable pause as the two women sank into their mutual shyness. “I suppose I could always go busking, or play in coffee shops and friendly pubs.  I’ve even been offered a position in a band to play the electric violin, but I made a decision to stick to my studies instead.”

“A violin playing calm strings of music in a coffee shop full of fabric seats and the smell of dark roast . . . now there’s an idea,” Jaehee said in wistful happiness, tilting her head back a little to imagine it. “Maybe a good romance novel to accompany . . .”

“Sound like a place you’d like to be on a rainy afternoon,” Nari added, turning her head closer to grin fondly.  “I don’t blame you.”

Jaehee cleared her throat softly, as if trying to wake herself up from her daydream. “In truth, I’ve always wanted to own my own business, and I have a fondness for cafés.”

“What’s stopping you?”

“Life didn’t line up that way,” she said a bit grimly. “And it is a privilege to work for Mr. Han.”

“Privilege or not,” Nari continued, “I think you can do anything you put your mind to, Jaehee.”

She couldn’t see Jaehee’s deep blush.

Mai placed her long snout along Nari’s lap and whimpered a bit, causing her owner to gasp.  “Oh, I’m so sorry, Mai.  You’re probably dying by now.”  She stopped carefully and grasped the lead on Mai so she could weave out of the chairs. “Any chance anyone can show me where Mai can . . . do her business?”

“Of course,” Jaehee returned, seeming a bit uncomfortable.  “Mr. Han told me how to handle this if it happened.  There is a garden on the roof floor you can use.  It’ll be cleaned up after you, don’t worry.”

Saeran shot up like a wet cat.  “I’ll take her.  I need a smoke anyway.  Zen, wanna come?”

The actor sighed dramatically. “Naw, I’m on a dart a day, now.  Thank, though.”

“Alright, suit yourself,” Saeran said, pacing towards the door.  “C’mon, follow me.”

“Follow Saeran, Mai,” Nari prompted quietly, pulling away towards the hallway.

It was an icy cold trip up two flights by the elevator, leaving Nari oddly on edge.  Saeran was deathly quiet, only his steady breathing and the occasional restless shuffle as he shifted the weight in his hips.  Nari clutched tighter to Mai’s lead, keeping her head down a little as she wondered why he always had to embody the dark, brooding teenager act.

The garden was surprisingly refreshing for being almost entirely a greenhouse.  Though she couldn’t tell precisely what sorts of plants bordered the cobblestone walkway, but it had a sweet aroma like some tropical varieties.  It seemed as though the water system had just misted fresh dew on the leaves; the air was heavy with cool moisture that her eyelashes could feel.  She felt awful for this, but it was what her host had arranged for her, so she went along.  Once Mai was off the walkway a bit, Nari gave the command for the poor thing to relieve herself as Saeran lit his cigarette.

There was a crackling burning noise, the loud _clink_ as the lighter shut closed, and the long inhale like a starving man’s latest meal. Nari drew in a relaxing breath before the distinct sting of nicotine met her nostrils.  They lingered silently again, and Nari scuffed her shoes back and forth on the stone while taking this quiet time to make sure her black feathered pixie cut was lying obediently around her face.

“So,” Saeran broke, tilting his head back while keeping his minty eyes on her straight, boyish frame.  He blew out a puff before continuing.  “What’s it like to be blind?”

 _What a ridiculous question._ The way he phrased it, the tone of his voice—it was like he was trying to annoy her.  Or maybe, it was a challenge?  A test to see how she would react?  She took a few heartbeats to respond.

“What’s it like to slowly destroy your respiratory system?”

He let out a dark low laugh.  “Touché.  I’ve been cutting back, actually.”

She didn’t even blink.  “Well, I can assure you, there is no cutting back on dysfunctional retinas.”

Saeran’s shoe scraped as he kicked a small plant casually. “Sorry,” he muttered almost inaudibly, and Mai panted happily as she returned to her caretaker.

“It’s alright, honest,” Nari returned weakly, a pang of compassion heating her face.  “It’s just—you’d be surprised how often that happens with people I’m getting to know.  How am I supposed to respond? How can I make them imagine? I can’t imagine having sight, so how can I make you imagine not having it? It’s a blessing and a curse, it makes me feel brave and frightened, and I can experience the world in a way that those with sight will never understand, and really, no matter how much they pretend, they never really want to.”

Suddenly an intense flare rose into her face.  “I—I’m so, so sorry!  I didn’t intend to dump all that on you.”  Nari brushed past Saeran quickly, trying to escape the impossible situation, but he stopped her by clutching her arm. Mai growled at the slightly rough treatment.

“It’s fine, Mai, don’t worry,” Nari hushed, wobbling a bit at the sudden stop. “Can I—”

“Hold on, a few more puffs,” he interrupted, as if he didn’t remember what just happened.

“Oh—okay . . .”

Another long inhale and exhale.  He streamed the smoke in an ‘o’ shape as far away from her as possible.  “It’s okay, I get it,” he sighed slowly.  “People like to pretend they care, but they don’t want a complicated answer.  They want something they can swallow, something they can process and feel good about easily.  Not me.  I can’t speak for the others, but you gave the best answer to that question.  Better than I could have.  The frustration and confusion is real, and I get that.”

Nari listened carefully, finally letting out the breath she didn’t know she was holding.  She closed her eyes to soak it in, thinking back to the sorrowful stories Mina had recounted to her one stressful week not too long ago.  They had been friends for some time already, shared secrets and embarrassments, but this was the first big thing.

“Mina told me—a bit.”

“How much?”

“Enough for compassion without patronizing pity,” Nari returned flatly, knowing he would mostly likely not want to go further.

He relaxed a bit, pivoting on his step to head back, his light hand sliding off her warm arm gently as he went.

The return was just as silent, but not nearly as uncomfortable.  Mina and Jumin had drinks awaiting them, the group already boisterous with talk of what sort of game to play.

“Easy,” Saeyoung announced confidently as Nari and Saeran settled down once again. “We’ll play ‘Never Have I Ever’!”

Saeran scoffed.  “Again?”

“What? It’s a good way to get to know new people!”

“I don’t mind,” Nari added.

“No, no—‘Truth or Dare’ is much more . . . flexible,” Zen insisted.  If there was such a thing as ‘bedroom voice’ instead of ‘bedroom eyes’, that would be it.

“Also good,” Mina agreed.

“How does that work with drinks?” Nari asked, trying to imagine the possibilities.

“If you don’t want to say the truth or do the dare, you take a big sip,” Zen explained.  “Or people can dare you to take a sip.  The idea is, the more drunk you are, the more you’re willing to do or say.”

“This could be disastrous,” Jaehee muttered hopelessly.  Mina gave her a comforting nudge.

“Alright, let’s do it up!” Saeyoung exclaimed.  “Nari! You first! Truth . . . or DARE?!”

“Truth,” she returned quickly.

“Who is you favourite classical composer?” Jumin asked, seizing the opportunity before Saeyoung could snap it up.

Nari tapped her chin for a moment.  “Mmm . . . I’d have to say Vivaldi.  _Seasons_ captured my young heart early.”

“Fine choice,” Jumin nodded.

“ _Booooored_ ,” Zen complained.  “This game is supposed to be juicy!”

“Then you better make it juicy when it’s your turn,” Mina told him humorously.

“Alright, Mina,” Nari continued, turning her head to the young woman beside her.  “Truth or dare?”

She thought for a moment. “I’ll go with . . . _dare_.”

“I dare you to kiss me!!” Saeyoung announced, almost as if he was anticipating it.

Everyone burst into laughter at his spontaneity. He was always a flirt with Mina, even after a year of marriage, and often acted like a lovestruck teenager, much to Saeran’s exasperation.  Mina scooted to the edge of the couch and leaned up with her lips puckered towards her husband.  He excitedly shuffled over the coffee table between them, but just as they were almost about to do the deed, Mina pulled away and took a dramatic gulp from her glass.  The group erupted into loud ‘ooo’s and ‘oohh!!’s at her sassy betrayal, and she winked at a dejected Saeyoung.  Jumin leaned towards Nari’s ear to explain what happened, his breath tickling her neck.  She smiled at the hilarity and stifled a blush.

“Jaehee,” Mina said while coming down from a giggle, “truth or dare?”

The professional young woman said nothing, but immediately took a sip of her strong beverage, the ice clinking against the glass.  A few chuckled at her calm expression and brisk behaviour.

“No fun,” Zen huffed.

“Truth or dare, Zen,” Jaehee relayed.

“Dare, obviously,” the actor chose, shifting in his seat like he was ready for anything.

While some considered embarrassing options, Nari built up the guts to blurt out, “Sing.”

“What?” Yoosung said, startled.

“I—he said he could sing.” Nari stuttered, “I want to hear it.”

“Of course I will, love,” he said, voice a silky smooth.  “Though, in front of an expert, I find myself a little nervous.” He cleared his throat and straightened, everyone growing quiet in wait of his mini-performance.

His tone was crystalline and robust, but he sung the traditional lullaby pensively, the tenor notes slipping from his mouth like honey.  Despite having a lower speaking voice (though not as low as Jumin’s), Zen sung higher and sweeter than Nari expected, like a young father singing his firstborn infant to sleep.  A few lines in, Nari couldn’t contain herself.  It was such a pretty tune; it begged for a harmony.  She joined halfway through the verse, her voice high and delicate, weaving with his like lace.  Zen carried on and even adjusted to mesh with her even better, and the room grew astonished at the serene string of music.

Once they had finished, a series of claps and cheers came from the small audience, and Nari’s mind returned to reality from her musical trance. Zen was also clapping for her, causing a bit of redness to flower in her face.

“Bravo,” he chimed, his tone implying a wide smile.  “It’s been a while since such a pleasant female voice accompanied mine.”

Jaehee betrayed her excitement.  “What a delightful duet!  I hope you two will sing together at the party—that is, if you’ll attend, Nari.”

Nari smiled shyly. “I’ll think about it.”

“Well, I will always take a chance to hear such a heavenly song from you, angel,” Zen added happily and flamboyantly. He was just being flirtatious, Nari knew, so she didn’t think much of it. Though, how they sang together made her spine tingle a bit at the thought.  From what she could gather from Mina, Zen was a very handsome young man, and although that didn’t mean much to her, the slightly egotistical confidence was oddly attractive.  He did compliment her, after all, so there was kindness there, too.

Saeran took a swig of his drink before his brother could make him do or say anything embarrassing.  Yoosung meekly went with truth, to which Mina asked if he had his first kiss yet.  He sputtered that he had not, though he had gotten close at a party about a month ago, but he felt bad because the girl was too drunk to make a good decision.  Saeyoung, of course, asked for a dare, and Nari swiftly dared him to kiss Mina as revenge from earlier.  He made a big show of coming around the coffee table and dipping her back for a long dramatic smooch.

Jumin chose truth and Zen leapt at the chance. “Finally! Are you actually gay?”

Nari sniggered softly.  “Are you interested?” she teased.

Jumin chuckled quietly with her and shook his head.  “This has been a long debate in the RFA group chat, and I have thus far refused to give a straight answer.”

“Heheh.  A _straight_ answer,” Saeyoung giggled.

“Why does it matter?” Yoosung sighed with a hint of aggrevation.

“Answer.  Don’t say something vague, either,” Zen insisted. 

Jumin opened his mouth and inhaled like he was ready to say something, then quickly reached for his drink and took a sip with a wolfish smile.

“You bastard,” Zen droned, though Nari could tell he was grinning at Jumin’s clever victory.

Jaehee and Mina whispered something and giggled.

“Miss Joung, truth or dare?”

Nari hummed to herself as the decision rolled around in her head for a while. “Dare, I suppose.”

“Give a kiss to the prettiest person here!” Saeyoung challenged.

“What is it with you and kissing people?” Saeran huffed, crossing his arms into his chest.

“That’s easy,” Nari announced, leaning down to hold her loyal companion’s face in her hands, planting a loving peck on the dog’s nose.  Mai shook her head and sneezed after Nari released her, inspiring chuckles all around the circles.

The game continued with ridiculous and hilarious results, but by the time Jaehee got to the bottom of her third drink trying to avoid truths and dares, they decided to call it a night.  After a few minutes of goodbyes and see-you-soons, Mina rode with Nari and Mai in one of the many fine cars provided by Jumin.

“I really enjoyed tonight,” Nari confessed.  “You all seem like a family.  Thank you for inviting me.”

“My pleasure,” Mina returned. “You’ve been such a great friend these past few months, and I hope you and Mai become a part of our big happy family, too.”

Nari smiled to herself.  “I hope for that, too.”

“Will you come to the party?” Mina asked carefully, trying not to apply any pressure.

“I think I will.  I can perform too, if you like.  Maybe in a spot with the dance accompaniment?”

“Wonderful!  I’m sure I can figure something out for you.  God, I have a lot to do still, but having you there is nothing compared to appeasing the beasts, don’t worry.”

“I’m glad I’m not too much trouble,” Nari said quietly.

“Never, bestie,” Mina grinned, squeezing her in a side hug across the car seats.

“Thanks, Mina.”

 

 


	2. Chatrooms and Screen Readers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty, so the votes were very pro-Saeran, which I'm very happy to accommodate.
> 
> Hope you enjoy this next step.

“Nari, Mai!  C’mon in,” Saeyoung greeted happily, though his tone betrayed how sleepy he was.  Nari thanked him and drifted inside, being sure to shake out her drenched umbrella before tracking her damp rainboots into their foyer.  She wondered how he could be so fatigued at this hour; Mina had invited her over for lunch and coffee, but he was acting like it was 7 am after a rough night.  Perhaps insomnia, she concluded.

“Love ~ ! Nari is here,” Saeyoung called, taking the guest’s coat as she stooped to pull a towel out of her small brown bag.  He glanced as the young blind woman expertly dried and fluffed up the fur of her black lab before the poor dog tried to shake her coat out all over the house.

“I’ll be right there, honey,” Mina returned musically, and Nari smiled to herself at the sound of the loving pet names between the young couple. 

“You can find your way around?  I’ll go see if she needs help,” he said.

“Sure, I’ll be fine,” Nari replied sweetly, straightening up respectfully.

She heard his quick socked footfalls across the hardwood floor of the small foyer and through the open arch towards the dining room and kitchen on the right.  Nari knew the house well after being friends with Mina for so long. The first floor was built like a loop, with the living room on the left of the foyer with soft short carpet, wrapped around with the kitchen and guest bathroom at the back, and returned with the dining room.  The staircase leading upstairs to Saeyoung’s office, master and guest bedrooms and downstairs to the basement was almost directly in front of the foyer, with some small hallway space in between.  It was enough for a closet, coat hanger, stand table, that sort of thing. She loved their home; it was new to them after moving shortly before Nari and Mina met, but they had claimed the place with character, becoming incredibly welcoming and just . . . felt bright, but not in the literal sense.

Nari detected the scent of sesame oil and garlic, mouth watering in slight anticipation of a decent warm meal.  She dutifully used the towel to dry Mai’s paws before the dog had the chance to scamper across the lovely clean floors.  She heard light, creeping steps up the carpet basement stairs towards her and lifted her head to greet the under-dweller.

“Good morning, Saeran,” she mused.  It _was_ technically morning, around 11:30. She was well acquainted with the young man’s night owl schedule, often running into him in the kitchen when he was in search for the cereal. It was a bit early for him today, though.

“Mm.” Saeran blinked at her, recalling Mina’s voice last night as she had mentioned something about Nari coming over the next day. It was almost a weekly occurrence, he was used to it.  But today . . . maybe it was the dark red turtleneck that clung to her slender torso, or perhaps the black distressed jeans exposing her bony knees, or even how she quickly ran her small fingers through her feathered bangs dampened by the rain . . .

 Nari stood up and sighed with satisfaction after removing Mai’s big lead.  It was probably nice for her to get out of that thing while wet, he thought, admiring how Nari put so much consideration into her fuzzy partner.  She placed it next to her bag and removed her bright blue rainboots, the rubber and plastic making a soft squeak against each other as she pulled her striped-socked feet out.  She placed a couple of gentle fingers on the wall nearby for balance, and Mai panted happily after being finally warm and dry. “What an unexpected storm,” Nari said with a small smirk, almost as if she was laughing at her own situation.  “They said it would just be a drizzle, but Mai’s fur was super fluffy from the humidity, so I knew better.”  She paused, running her hand through her hair again.  Seemed to be a nervous tick.  “You still there?”

“Yeah,” he replied simply, still watching her.  It was so odd.  He could look at her, and she wouldn’t know.  Suddenly it was weirder.  He self-consciously adjusted his MCR band t-shirt and ruffled his hair. “Why . . . did you think I just left?”

She giggled, but it was more like a low amused chuckle rather than a high girly tee-hee. “You’re pretty quiet, and I know nothing can keep between you and breakfast.”

He flushed, embarrassed at how she was so entertained.  “The two of you must be freezing, it’s windy out there,” he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck a little awkwardly.

“It’s worth the trip, though,” Nari said soundly, easily finding her way past him through the dining room, Mai hot on her heels.  Saeran’s gaze lingered on the dog as she traced behind her caretaker, and he couldn’t help but smirk a little.  Somehow, whenever he was having difficulty remembering what use there was in getting up in the mornings, Nari would visit Mina, and things would get a little brighter with their pleasant chatter.

Mina sauntered into the dining room, holding out a platter of sizzling hot dumplings and a pot of coffee.  She seemed a little flushed, her long brown tresses of hair falling a little less gracefully than usual.  Saeran supposed she was a bit unkempt from cooking and hurrying out with the food for her guest, or perhaps she and Saeyoung were up to no good briefly.  Likely the latter, Saeran internally sighed.  He was very pleased that he couldn’t hear anything in the basement during the night.

“Hi, Nari! Didn’t get too drenched, did you?” Mina chirped.  Nari was curious as to why her friend’s voice was a little higher and rushed than usual.  As if reading Saeran’s mind, her head twitched in his direction and her brows were high, though her eyes couldn’t give a suspicious look.

“No, Mai and I are just fine, thanks for asking.”

“Oh, Saeran! Want to join us?” Mina offered, placing the platter and pot on the table and setting out a couple of mugs.

He fidgeted a bit, then shook his head, walking towards the kitchen.

“Probably just wants food and then will go back to his cave,” Mina mused as Nari took a seat.

Saeran listened absentmindedly to them begin some friendly chatter, though he wasn’t really absorbing any of it, as he collected some of the extra dumplings in the pan.  His brother was there, leaning up against the counter with the sink, sipping not-so-subtly from his mug of coffee and trying to hide his blush by continuously adjusting his glasses on the bridge of his nose. The younger twin hissed out an annoyed sigh.

“Be decent, we have a guest,” Saeran scolded quietly.

“Just because it bugs you doesn’t mean Nari noticed,” Saeyoung laughed in a mutter.

Saeran made a sharp noise with his tongue. “It’s not about whether she noticed you two making out, it’s the fact you do it at all in a lady’s presence.”

Saeyoung made a hummed tone similar to a ‘lah-dee-dah’ or an ‘ooohoohoo’. “So you think she’s a lady, huh?”

“Of course!” Saeran sputtered quickly, looking down at his food to keep away from his brother’s gaze. He was only met by a sly chuckle. He ate in relative silence, hearing Nari’s voice smoothly slide out intelligently. Saeyoung cleared his throat a bit.  To anyone else, it would have seemed to be genuine, but Saeran knew better.  “What?” he demanded, his annoyance quota filling quickly.

Saeyoung gave him a side-long look, gold irises softly teasing. “You know.”

“Shut the fuck up,” he hissed.

“Hey, there’s a lady over there, be decent.”

“I hate you.”

“Love you too, Sae.”

“Rr.” Saeran gave up and returned to the dining room with his plate setting down in the seat at the end as far from Mina and Nari as possible.

“Changed your mind?” Nari asked, smiling kindly.

Saeran wanted to shrug, but realized that would be dumb. “I guess.  How’d you know it was me?”

“Saeyoung would’ve sat next to Mina,” Nari returned plainly, and Saeran mentally punished himself for being so stupid.  It was so obvious.

Mina must’ve noticed his frustrated expression. “Hey, relax, you just woke up.”

His scowl softened slowly. “ . . . Yeah.”

“Anyway, as I was saying, I talked to the others over the past couple of weeks, and we agreed that you should become a part of the RFA.  At least temporarily.  Everyone really liked you, and you’ve become such a good friend to me.  The three of us, really,” Mina explained.

Nari’s eyebrows knit together, but her smile persevered. “I really appreciate this, and I would love it.  I know how personal the RFA app is to your group. But practically, it may not work with my screen reader software,” she said, quiet and apprehensive.  She seemed disappointed to relay the information and accept its reality.

Something clicked in Saeran’s head.  So that’s why Saeyoung needed him to design the voice recognition software.

“Actually, we thought of that.  Saeyoung and Saeran got it covered.  They made a version of the app for you that has a very advanced screen reader and voice recognition,” Mina returned with excitement.  “It’s fuckin’ awesome, actually.  I don’t know how they do it, but it’s worth it for you, bestie.”

Nari was dumbfounded.  She didn’t say anything for a couple of seconds, turning her head to Saeran, then back to her friend.  “I—you didn’t have to—oh my godthankyousomuch—!” she stuttered quickly, her hands digging into the hem of her turtleneck and an irresistible innocent smile forcing itself on her face like she was afraid to show how grateful she was.

That’s when Saeyoung decided to take a seat next to his lovely wife. “It’s almost done.  We need your help to polish it up and make your personalized emojis. Record your voice a bit. You okay with that?”

“Of course, anything for all your hard work!” Nari burst immediately, though her voice was still politely low. She ran her fingers through her bangs again.

“Great! We can hammer out a little today.  Saeran will record your audio and finish up the emojis.  I can go over the actual interactive stuff with you to make sure it’s comfortable.”

“Why do I have to record the audio?” Saeran asked, not liking the idea of bringing her downstairs into his messy space to get at his mic.

“Because you’re the one doing her chatroom stuff,” Saeyoung reminded him, his voice playful but his point firm. “Don’t worry, Nari, once you’re finished eating, I’ll go through the ropes with you nice and slow.  We want to make sure this works.”

“This is so kind of you all.  I know you two have other work you do, and to take time out of your schedules like this is—”

“Sweetie, you’re rambling,” Mina reminded her with a giggle, and Nari let out an anxious puff of a laugh.  She was hunched with embarrassment, shoulders bent in and her neck gracefully sloped up and forward as she nodded slowly.  Saeran traced the curve of her face at this three-quarters angle, pleased that he was able to capture her expressions in those annoyingly chibi-style emojis Saeyoung made him imitate.

Saeyoung was already asking questions about Nari’s screen reader software to grasp how she likes to use it.  They ate, Nari helped Mina with the dishes, and quickly she was swept off to the older twin’s office for a debriefing. Saeran, not really wanting to go back to the basement with Nari around, decided to follow them to see how it would go.

“So I had an AI system already handy from other projects,” Saeyoung explained, leading Nari to an extra spinning chair next to his and opened up the program.  Saeran slumped against the doorframe in a brooding fashion, faintly hearing Mina baby-talking Mai downstairs.  “Her name is Elly, and she’ll only be listening to you if you open the app, okay?”

“Isn’t that what you call Jumin’s cat?” Nari asked, inspiring a smirk from Saeran.

“Of course!” Saeyoung chimed. “I’m honouring her in the only way I know how. Through wonderful programming code!!  But that’s beside the point.  When you open up the app and need anything: screen reading, to send a text, open the group chat and send a message there, all you have to do is say, ‘Elly, wake up’.”

“That’s it?” Nari replied, in a little bit of overwhelmed disbelief.

 “That’s it,” Saeyoung confirmed, and she heard his mouse double-click as he opened it. “Here, try it out.  It won’t actually send anything, this is just a trial shell.”

“Okay . . .” she muttered, paused and unsure for a moment.  “Uh, Elly, wake up,” she crooned sweetly, making a chill run through Saeran.  It was so innocent, so unimposing and kind, so cautious and embarrassed. “Send a text to Mina.”

“ _Sending a text to Mina, mew.  What would you like to say?”_

She almost jumped at the voice.  It wasn’t very loud, sort of cutesy, but far from annoying or grating, which she was grateful for if she was going to use it often. “How are you today?”

After a brief pause, Elly assumed she was done.

_“Sending it to Mina, nyan.”_

“Woah,” Nari whispered.

“I know, right?  I worked pretty hard to make it so sophisticated,” Saeyoung exclaimed proudly.

“Don’t make her feel like she’s too much trouble,” Saeran butt in, worried that she would try to thank them for the billionth time.

“Right, sorry. Try the screen reader.  Just play around.”

“Elly, wake up.  Read the screen,” Nari commanded, her tone still undyingly polite despite the fact she was talking to a machine.

_“RFA Home Menu. Profiles of Han Jumin, Zen, 707, Choi Saeran, Kim Yoosung, Kang Jaehee, Choi Mina. Photo Gallery. Direct messages. Phone calls. Group chatroom. Settings. Your profile.”_

“Elly, open the group chatroom.”

“She’ll go through a little fake loop of messages here,” Saeyoung added quickly.

_“Jumin and Mina are in the chatroom. Jumin says ‘Hello Miss Joung, how are you?”_

“She recognizes punctuation?” Nari asked quietly, amazed.

“If it’s used right.  Otherwise she skips over it,” Saeyoung explained.

“What about typos?”

“Autocorrects them,” Saeran said.

“That’ll be interesting,” Nari laughed softly.

“Oh, sometimes people will use exaggerated strings of symbols or all caps—”

“And by people he means him,” Saeran quipped, causing a giggle from Nari.

“—Elly will tell you if it’s in caps or if it’s just a bunch of symbols.  Here’s an example—”

He clicked a couple of times.

_“707 says ‘/semicolon/’ 11 times. 707 says ‘Elly is the /caps/ BEST! /caps/’.”_

“The emojis have voice audio of everybody, and it’s pretty easy to tell which emotion,” Saeyoung continued. “I’ll try to tell everyone to use decent punctuation and minimize the crazy symbols so there isn’t too much lag between Elly and the actual chat.”

“You were so thorough,” Nari murmured in wonder. “I think this will work just fine for me.”

“Awesome.  Let’s just get to some details that have been bugging me,” he sighed, sounding a bit tired as he piloted the mouse around.  “It won’t take long, Sae, so you can go set up your microphone downstairs for her.”

“’kay,” Saeran agreed, pushing himself off the door frame and climbing down the stairs casually with his gangly long legs.

Then he saw his room. 

Then he panicked a bit. The couch facing the large flat screen with the gaming consoles was littered with tossed clothes and papers.  He wasn’t one dirty with food, unlike his brother, but the carpet could probably have done with a vacuum. Past the couch was his bed next to his PC setup, the dresser with opened and messy drawers, the small high window covered with curtains, and the microphone was tucked behind a pile of dirty laundry.  He practically scrambled to get things looking at least half-decent and pulling out the mic.

Sighing from the sudden burst of energy, he plopped into his office chair and opened his recording software, connecting all the right wires in all the right places to begin. 

He didn’t have a chair for her to sit in.  Maybe she could sit on the bed . . . ?

Why was he feeling warm? _Dumb. It’s just a bed. Don’t be dumb about this._

Some cautious footfalls alighted the stairs, as if they weren’t sure if it was okay to come down.

“Saeran?” Nari called out.

“Yeah, over here,” he returned, raising his volume just a bit to make absolutely sure she could hear him past the dryer going in the room adjacent to his. “You need help?”

Nari plotted down to the floor and walked carefully towards his voice.  It smelled a bit like dust, spruce-scented cologne, and laundry detergent.  She decided that it was quite pleasant. “No I’m fi—”

She cut off when her toe bashed into the coffee table between the couch and the TV set, being too confident about where she was going. She stumbled a bit, making Saeran leap out of his seat in alarm, but caught herself, instinctively grabbing her foot in pain. “Shit—!”

Saeran froze up a bit. “Ar-are you alright?!” he exclaimed (or at least, it was exclaiming for his normally low tones).  He had never, _ever_ heard Nari swear outright like that, and certainly never seen her pain.  His stomach twisted and he felt his mind sort of sweat at the very new situation.

“I’m okay! I’m okay!!” she hissed, but there was some kindness returning to her.  “Sorry, I do this all the time, I think I can handle it when really I have no idea where I’m going.”

He approached her carefully and brushed her elbow with his hand for permission to guide her, to which she accepted. “Everybody gets a little in over their head sometimes,” he muttered in reassurance.

Her brows met in embarrassment. “Heh, thanks.” Soon she was seated at the edge of his bed, and him in his chair. He guided her hands to the microphone in front of her without a word, but they seemed to understand each other without the need for verbal communication at that moment. “I’m really sorry for scaring you,” she sighed hopelessly, clearly disappointed in herself.

“It’s fine,” he recited, getting a couple things ready on his computer.

“But it’s not,” Nari insisted, her voice a bit strained.  Saeran glanced at her, her back straight but her arms and shoulders in like she was imposing too much.  Where was the strong young woman who told him off for destroying his lungs just a few weeks back? “I just get a bit frustrated—everyone asking if I need help, if there’s anything they can do for me, if there’s anything I need.  I’m a person.  If I wasn’t blind they wouldn’t do things like that.  I should be able to walk across a new room without ramming into something . . .”

He felt himself compress with a twinge of compassion.  “Believe me, I get it.”  There was a bitterness to it that she understood immediately, and they didn’t need to say any more. “Have you started practicing anything for the party?” he asked, attempting to change the subject.

“Oh, yeah, just a couple things,” she admitted.  One I composed myself, the other is a nice little Irish solo. I can’t believe it’s only a month away. Mina wanted me in the dance ensemble, but a team’s melding is very important, so I didn’t want to tip the balance.  I’m happy to just perform for a couple of minutes.”

“You get stage fright?”

“Not really.  I get butterflies at first, but I don’t think that will ever go away.  But once I start playing, everything else . . . melts away, and it’s just me and my violin. Like being with my best friend, but better.”

“Hm,” Saeran nodded, finishing up the settings he wanted. “Okay, so everyone has slightly different emojis, but I made some for you that I think fit pretty well.  If you ever can’t remember, you can get . . . ‘Elly’ . . . to recite them for you.  There’s one for happiness, blushing, irritation, quizzical, shock, sadness, embarrassment, unimpressed, disheartened, and ‘stars-in-eyes’ excitement.”

Nari let out the most bubbled and musical pop of a laugh at the way he said the last one, and he was so glad he pressed record before she noticed.

“Hey, that was perfect for the happiness one, nice job.”

“Eh? You already starting recording?”

“There, that one is good for the quizzical one,” he encouraged somewhat nonchalantly, though she knew he was pleased.

They continued for less than thirty minutes; Zen would have been impressed with her acting ability. She gasped for the excitement, let out a cute hum for the blush, ‘tsk’ed her tongue to be unimpressed, sighed softly as disheartened, a perturbed noise for embarrassment, made a sharp but low cry in shock, and then . . .

“I can’t cry on cue,” she said plainly after several dramatic attempts.

Saeran chuckled a bit darkly, making her spine tingle a bit. “I never said you should cry.  Just sound sad.”

“Hmm . . . like this?” Her brow creased a bit as she morphed her face into a pout, eyes open wide and glassy, and she gave a small sniff and a sob that anyone who didn’t know her would be convinced by.

“That’s . . . exactly what I was looking for,” he muttered, resting a couple of fingers around his chin and lips as he clicked off the recording and began rearranging the audio. “Thanks a lot, you’re done.”

“That was fun,” Nari said with a friendly grin. “I hope I gave you the right material.  I think I should take Mai out really quick now, excuse me.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

Once she was walking away, his gaze lingered on her slender boyish frame, watching the edges of her movements carefully, admiring the way her small body held so much presence.  Maybe not to other people, but it was there for him. For some jerk on the street, she was just a woman easy to throw around, push into a corner or ignore, but he knew better.  He knew she meant so much more than she said, and was holding everything back so no one could fuss and treat her different. They were similar that way, he supposed, suppressing the warmth rising up his throat and into his face.

Her voice speaking to Mina broke him from his trance to listen briefly, then shook himself from the thoughts to focus on work.  _Don’t be so stupid. She’s nothing like you, she’s far too innocent and clean to understand you. Too smart, too talented, too kind for a fuck-up like you. She couldn’t possibly understand. You don’t deserve her kindness._

_You don’t deserve her._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fluff, fluff, fluff, fluff, fluff--  
> Surprise! Angst.
> 
> I have a rough idea of how I want this relationship to progress, but if you all have some ideas, big or small, let me know! Happy to hear your thoughts.


	3. A Short Goodnight

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my time zone, it is "goodnight".
> 
> Here's another chapter: it's short and sweet.

It was late.  Her arm was tired, and the way the hairs on the bow didn’t quite produce the full thrum of a note like she wanted meant it was time to stop.  There was no sense in pushing herself, it only made things worse, but the fact that she couldn’t achieve the fluidity she wanted in one string of measures was irritating her immensely. 

Nari pushed her chair away from her braille music and carefully placed her smooth violin into its felt case.  She stood and stretched, arms high above her head, the hem of her shirt riding up her pale stomach, and a small squeaking groan slipped past her lips as the blood flowed back into her legs. She heard Mai yawn and lick her chomps from her pet bed and blanket, sleepily gnawing on a dental bone.

“Mm, good idea, girl,” Nari muttered, slumping not too far to her bathroom to brush her teeth.  _Low on toothpaste,_ she sighed, pulling her phone out halfway through brushing. She spit before talking, deciding what day to do groceries. “Clova, set a reminder on Saturday at 9 am to pick up toothpaste.”

_“Reminder set.”_

She yawned, cracking her spine in a couple places before returning to the bedroom to change into a short pair of pajama shorts and a tank top, flopping onto her bed.  She opened the RFA app, having memorized her touch screen layout, of course.  Then she paused, letting her arm fall to her side onto the plush comforter in defeat. 

“The light is still on, isn’t it?” she muttered, groaning louder in the effort of getting up and flicking it off.  The muffled sound of a door shutting echoed down the hall.  Her roommate, Duri, must’ve gone to bed as well.  _Odd. Normally she stays up past eleven. Maybe has a test tomorrow._

Nari almost ran and jumped into her warm bed again, cocooning herself in all the blankets, and Mai took the opportunity to leap up and settle at the end of the bed by her caretaker’s feet. The young woman sighed, patting her hand around for her phone and plugging it into the nearby charger at her nightstand. She didn’t even really need to hold it at this point.

“Elly, wake up,” she called.

_“Purr.  It’s late, Nari.  Don’t stay up too much longer.”_

Nari smiled herself, still in a bit of delighted disbelief at how much coding the twins did on this thing.  It was so much fun to use. Even Duri loved playing with it. “Is anyone online?”

_“Jumin and Saeran are online, nyan.”_

“Open the group chat.”

The app made a confirming noise as if she had pressed the button on the screen herself.  And she could have; she memorized it as well.  Saeyoung helped her with the layout and she had the chance to set up a nice picture on her profile.  It was a black-and-white photo of her that her mother had taken last year.  She didn’t know what it looked like, obviously, but she remembered the day: her mom had dragged her to the park during one of her sad days. It was pouring rain, but warm enough not to cause a shiver.  She had sat under a cherry blossom tree, and her mother secretly took the photo. Mina always said it was the best picture of Nari she had ever seen.  Clothes damp, her face, hair, and the blossoms around her dripping with the clean clear droplets, but somehow her eyes were downcast, her face wistful but happy. When the photo was printed for the first time, her mother had cried as she attempted to describe it, and it was then that Nari realized that no matter their disagreements, she was so loved.

She sighed just thinking about it, recalling how she had insisted to herself to always use the photo.  It wouldn’t be fair to mom otherwise.

_“Jumin says ‘Hello, Nari. I’m afraid I was just about to turn in for the night.”_

“Elly, open text.  It’s alright, Jumin.  I was only visiting for a moment.”

_“Sending.”_

_“Jumin says ‘Very well.  Have a good night.’”_

“Goodnight.”

_“Jumin has left the chatroom.”_

Saeran

                Oh good he left

Nari

                Saeran, play nice.

Saeran

                *irritated emote*

                i was just kidding.

                We were talking about being cat people

Nari

                I’d love to have a cat someday. I used to be strictly a cat person, but Mai became a loved convenience.

Saeran

                What kind of cat would you want?

Nari

                I don’t have any particulars. Except I want a rescue.

                I hear black cats have a hard time finding homes.  Something about superstition? I certainly don’t have a prejudice.

                *happy emote*

Saeran

I think I agree 


                Saeyoung and Mina have been thinking of getting a pet, and with his love of cats . . . it’s pretty obvious where this will lead.

Nari

                I’ve also always wanted a snake

Saeran

                *quizzical emote*

                seriously?

Nari

                What?

Saeran

                I didn’t expect that

Nari

                Because I’m a girl?

Saeran

                Yeah, I guess.

Nari

                Hey, guess what?

Saeran

                . . .

                What?

Nari

                I like tarantulas too!!

                *shock emote*

Saeran

                You’ve held a tarantula?

Nari

                Yeah, mom took me to a reptile and bug show thing when I was, like, ten.

                It was so fuzzy!

                And very relaxed.

Saeran

                most people are afraid of spiders.  Even guys

Nari

                I can understand.  Even without looking at one, it was pretty creepy-crawly.

Saeran

                Anything you’re afraid of?

Nari

                Uhh . . .

                Life choices? Parental expectations? The crippling weight of adult responsibility?!?!?

                Do those count?

Saeran

                Think so ;)

                At least, they do to me

Nari

                Phew. Thanks.

                *happy emote*

Saeran

                Didn’t take you for someone who worried about stuff like that.

Nari

                Doesn’t everybody?

Saeran

                Maybe everybody thinks about it. But worrying over it is different.

Nari

                What about you?

Saeran

                A little

                Sometimes it’s other stuff.

Nari

                That’s fair.

 

Nari paused, considering his words. Elly wasn’t great at putting emotion behind genuine words, but she caught the very shallow reveal of Saeran’s thoughts. Mina had talked about his past—his and Seayoung’s mother’s abuse, then his guardian and Yoosung’s cousin Rika, and that they saved him from that horrible situation—but she didn’t go into gory detail, and Nari didn’t ask her too.  It was sensitive and emotional.  Mina was worried about how Saeyoung and Saeran would feel about Nari knowing anything at all. There was more to this that the rest of the group knew about, but she knew it wasn’t her place to ask. What mattered was that Saeran was doing better than whatever it was like before. Or so she was told. After all, how could she know?

“Elly, open text.  I think I’ll hit the hay. I have a long practice at school tomorrow.”

_“Sending.”_

_“Saeran says ‘okay goodnight.’”_

Nari couldn’t help but grin, trying to imagine his soft dark tone actually saying it to her. “Open text. Sleep well, Saeran.”

_“Sending.”_

 

Saeran paused his console in the middle of making Link a meal at the sound of his text tone going off. He glanced at his newly awakened screen, capturing the short farewell phrase from Nari. _Sleep well, Saeran._

 _Fuck feelings. Stop feeling warm, idiot._ The blush persisted, and he sank into his spongy couch under the fluffy blanket on his lap. He hated this. He hated the way her words demanded all his attention.  He hated how her smile made his insides feel like water.  _Useless, stupid, idiot, dumbass feelings._ It would go nowhere. It would only lead to anger. He wanted to be angry at her, but it just deflected to himself.

Saeyoung was smart enough to figure it out.  He knew his brother more than Saeran liked to admit. He didn’t give the younger twin awkward loving brotherly advice yet, thank god.  That would get him nowhere.  There is no use for advice when this would go nowhere. But maybe . . . maybe she said it that way because she cared. Maybe she enjoyed talking to him? Maybe she actually liked—

_Nope. No, no, no, no, stop, stop, stop._

He paused the game again, the gesture against his controller a little more rough and dramatic. Fingers ran through his hair as he focused on his breathing and forced his temper down. He was acting like a teenager. This would be over. Just get over it and move on. Things will go back to normal.

But . . .

Maybe . . . ?

Then he remembered something.  Mina encouraged him to pick up music.  There was a piano in the living room, but no one played unless Nari would come to occasionally tickle the ivories.  For someone who hadn’t advanced in her piano training much in quite a few years, she was still very good at it. But if Mina wanted to hear music in the house more often . . .

He opened the direct messages.

Typing it out and pausing, his thumb hovered over the send button. She’d come to teach him, just learning music from her, no distractions. Things will go back to normal. He would get over this.

Right?

 

 

 

 

_Hey, can you teach me piano?_


	4. The Stage is Set

Saeran was pissed.  Woke up on the wrong side of the bed, far too early, to a series of frantic vibrations of his phone.  He had unraveled himself from his nest of covers and comforter, mindlessly slapping his nightstand to find the offending piece of technology and the author of all this heinous noise. Swearing to himself for not lowering the brightness setting the night before, he squinted through thick red lashes at 8 panicked messages from Yoosung.  The idiot had forgotten an assignment today.  Thankfully, it was already finished, he just needed to print it off and hand it in at 3 pm today.

Saeran had two choices. Ignore it and say he didn’t wake up from his phone, which would likely result in Yoosung’s ultimately fleeting despair and Saeran’s temporary continuation of slumber, or get up and bring his friend’s assignment to him, resulting in an incredibly drowsy afternoon and Yoosung’s complete gratitude.

 _Delayed gratification,_ Saeran decided, groaning to get out of bed. Yoosung was one of the best LOLOL players Saeran could find in a long time, and he would likely feel indebted.  Maybe there was something to gain? Yoosung was nice no matter what. _It’s the right thing to do . . ._

He slumped, legs dangling off the side of his bed, and sent a confirming text. 10:30. It was quite early for him, but not the end of the world. The mountain of blankets slid off his bare back, revealing the numerous pearly white scars and the dark tattoo splayed across his shoulder and arm. It was . . . a feature he didn’t think much of until recently. At first, he hated it, but didn’t want to go through the trouble of getting it removed.  Then it grew on him, not because of what it originally represented, but because it would remind him of how much worse things could have worked out: he was healthy, he was loved, he was safe.  He could have a life. But he would never forget.  And that was okay.

Saeran breathed in deep, pawing at his monstrously messy bed head, resisting the dangerous train of thought that would most certainly spiral him into crippling existential doubt. His phone exploded again with Yoosung’s rupturing happiness, and the young man smiled slightly. His legs felt like lead and his eyelids like anvils, but he supposed it was worth it.  A good long stretch and a pair of black jeans later, Saeran was leaning over the counter of his bathroom sink to wash his face as the printer toiled at Yoosung’s lost assignment.  His reflection caused pause: Mina’s good cooking and Saeyoung’s gym membership brought colour and substance back to his flesh over the last few months.  In fact, when Mina had first met Nari, he was still a skinny hermit with no cardiovascular health to speak of.

Thoughts drifted to the young blind woman.  She was considerably shorter than him, yet despite her distinctly adolescent build, she could probably best him in a few tests of strength.  She wasn’t thin, per se, but didn’t have Mina or Jaehee’s elegant and comely curves.  Nari was lithe, he supposed, fit from some sort of regular exercise and had the arm leanness of any good violinist, but mostly just looked strong for her stature. It was her face that was wonderfully kind, symmetrical, and large-eyed—

But he was getting carried away.  Carefully applying his minty contacts delicately to his irises, he paced back into his room to find a t-shirt and a light blue-and-gray striped sweater. His phone said it was colder today; autumn was disappearing fast, though some of the trees in town were still clinging to their orange and yellow leaves. Then he realized something. Saeyoung was likely busy in his office, Mina was at work by this hour, and he didn’t have a driver’s license.

Which left one alternative.

The public bus.

 _Yoosung better get on his hands and knees,_ Saeran sighed internally, shifting into a thick pair of socks and his converse shoes. Quickly stapling the assignment together and finding a stiff folder to keep it flat in his bag, he tossed his belongings over his shoulder and went up to the foyer as quickly as possible.  It was better that Saeyoung didn’t even know he was leaving. He would just worry.

Leather jacket on and earbuds in, he paced out the door to the beat of the first song, digging into his pocket for a quick smoke.

And then he remembered why he didn’t really enjoy leaving the house.  Sure, Mina and Saeyoung would drag him out kicking and screaming at least twice a week for dinner or a walk in the park. But this, on his own, hadn’t happened in a while.

_Just relax, you can handle it.  It’s no big deal._

He took a long inhale of the tobacco, then flicked it aside. This neighbourhood was delightfully quiet.  Young trees formed a barrier between the sidewalk and the occasional car. People were at work, kids were in school, only the rare dog would take notice of him passing by their fenced enclosure and bark until he was out of sight.  The air was crisp and the wind a bit numbing, but the sun more than made up for it.  Winter wouldn’t yet come for a little while.

An orange tabby tom was stretched out on the stone steps of a town house on Saeran’s right, sunning happily with its ears up and its eyes in an intelligent green squint. The young man couldn’t help but grin at the little fellow, taking a moment to stoop and offer his fingers for the creature to smell. The cat was alert, but took kindly to him, rolling back to expose his fuzzy tummy to the dappled sunlight.  Saeran made a small noise of admiration, scratching the tom under the chin before carrying on.

He nearly had a heart attack when he almost drove into a little girl in his path.  He stumbled back, mouth open slightly in shock but silent as he wondered where on earth she came from.  She was leering at him eerily, brown eyes unmoving as she clutched a small stuffed cat to her chest.  The toy looked homemade, and almost identical to the cat he had just interacted with.  She was maybe six, or seven?

“What are you doing?” she accused, a suspicious glint in her gaze.

Saeran glanced between the very content orange tabby and the mysterious girl. “I was just—saying hello?” He posed it like a question, unsure exactly what information she wanted from him.

“Oh,” she answered simply, seemingly satisfied with his reply.  Pacing over to her toy’s twin, she sat on the step.

“Shouldn’t you be in school?” he asked her, shuffling his feet on the concrete in preparation to leave the scene.

The little girl shrugged, playing with the floppy ears of her cat doll. “Sick day.”

“You don’t look sick to me.”

“Not me. Mom.”

Okay, colour him intrigued. “Your mom is sick?”

“Yup.”

“With what?”

She looked up at him this time, sending a shiver down his back. “She’s sad. She doesn’t take me to school when she’s sad. Just stays in bed.”

“Oh.”

 _Well this is awkward,_ Saeran thought to himself. _Likely no solution to this problem, at least not from me._

“Hey,” Saeran started, not really sure where he was going with it. The girl looked up at him again. “Sometimes people get really sad for a long time. So sad they don’t understand why they should do anything, because it never feels like it matters. But,” he swallowed, eyes flickering away slightly, “ _you_ matter. Don’t forget, okay? Your mom is just having a hard time remembering it. But if you remember, then maybe she will, too.”

“Okay,” she returned.  She didn’t smile, but she did understand, and that was enough for him.

So, he walked away.

The bus was fairly sparse, but it wasn’t lunch rush hour yet, so he wasn’t surprised.  It was calm for some time, giving him the chance to nod off for only a few moments. The jack-in-the-box girl was still gnawing a bit at his mind, but he pushed it to the back for now. Sleep first.

 

 

_Ding. SKY University. Last Stop._

Saeran opened his eyes slowly with a foggy recognition of something important. Ah, his stop. The bus stopped a little more dramatically than necessary, which irked him briefly. His lanky frame jerked forward before he swiftly exited, heart drumming loudly in his ears as he watched the other passengers follow a path along the large campus.  So many students. So many people.

_Breathe. . ._

_Breathe._

He soldiered on, joining the gentle flow of students and professors. Saeran had a vague idea of the campus; Yoosung had dragged him along when Mina suggested him checking out the computer science program. School would be a waste of his time; he got jobs from the same company as Saeyoung. Yoosung said he was in the lobby of the library waiting, which meant it wouldn’t be altogether difficult to find the young veterinarian student.

After swimming along the stream of people for a little while, he was surprised to see a bouncing head of blonde hair speed-walking towards him. Yoosung grinned wide and white at the sight of Saeran, who was just about ready to go home and not step outside for a few days.

“Hey! I thought I’d come meet you so you don’t get lost,” Yoosung chirped happily, panting slightly from the quick pace. Saeran nodded politely and gave a small smile, bringing his bag around his shoulder to pull out the freshly printed assignment. He produced it without looking up, and Yoosung snatched it like a greedy child. “Thankyouthankyouthankyou!! God, my heart nearly stopped when I got on the bus this morning and realized I forgot to bring it and—”

“It’s fine,” Saeran cut in, zipping his bag back up and straightening again.

Yoosung fidgeted a bit in his spot, looking like he was either waiting for Saeran to say something or thinking of something to say himself. Suddenly his face lit up. “Hey! Come let me show you something I found.”

“Wha—?”

“Trust me,” Yoosung announced cheerfully, grabbing Saeran’s wrist and dragging him along. Saeran wriggled himself away from Yoosung’s grip and simply followed behind him in an orderly, nervous fashion. He was paranoid, maybe—but why was everyone looking at him? _Something on my face?_ _No, they’re looking at Yoosung that way too . . . and everyone they pass. Just paranoid._

_Breathe._

His friend led him to a building not far from the library, and Saeran glanced at all the pictures of previous significant music students, professors, deans, and scholarship winners. Then he caught a face he knew. It was on a small set of scholarship winners over several years, but there was no mistake: Nari won a full scholarship for her first year of her violinist program. He stopped in hope of gleaning a bit more information, but Yoosung was quick to call after him.

Up a flight of stairs and down a few hallways, they were tracking along a narrow passage with a few slumbering classrooms. “245, 246, 247 . . .” Yoosung was carefully watching for the right room, pointing like he was keeping track. “Ah! 249.” He spun around on his heel and stood at attention by the door, waiting for Saeran to blink sleepily at the situation.

“What?” Saeran asked him, thoroughly confused.

“Go look,” Yoosung said, grinning.

“You’re not coming in, too?”

“I have to get back to my study group. I’d love to, otherwise.  Just trust me.”

Saeran raised a brow, but placed a hand on the doorknob anyway. Was this a prank? Something Saeyoung arranged? Maybe good intentions, but poor execution.

Then he heard a faint note . . . a pitch.  Then it changed.                

It was . . . _music._

“See ya later,” Yoosung called, already heading back down the small hallway.

 

And then he was alone.

 

Saeran sucked in a breath and pushed himself inside.

It was very empty. It resembled a small theatre, with lecture hall felt seats all facing a heightened stage, red curtains, grand piano in the back and all. And there, swaying with her own soft, smooth string of music, was the familiar figure of Nari.  She was walking back and forth across the stage, carefully counting her steps with the tempo of the music dripping from the bow and strings of her violin. Some twirls and rhythmic pauses were sprinkled into her movements, and her face was focused and downcast as her chin held down her precious instrument to her shoulder. There was such an intensity in her sightless eyes as she played, the effort clear in the tendons in her neck, the emotion of the piece written into her expression.

He couldn’t move.  He couldn’t speak. He just listened as her sweet, melancholic melody bound him to his spot, her legs gliding her in a deliberate measurement of distance to make sure she didn’t fall off the stage but somehow conveying the thoughtfulness of the piece.

The door behind him shut with a distinct _click._

Nari scraped across a sharp note, tearing her bow away from her violin, her body snapping towards the source of the noise as her gentle breath sucked in as a distinct _gasp._

Saeran was petrified.


	5. Painfully Polite Piano Pundit

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your patience. 
> 
> Here's another chapter for you.

“Um, who’s there?” Nari called out, her arms hanging down with the weight of her violin and bow respectively. She stepped forward one pace, as if trying to get closer to the source of the sound.

For what seemed like a few very long heartbeats, Saeran just stares, not even processing the idea of responding to her confusion. He was wondering a thousand things: _how did Yoosung find Nari, why did he lead me here, what now?!?_

“Yoosung?” Nari asks again. “Is that you?”

“N-no,” Saeran pops suddenly, quickly taking credit without thought. “Yoosung showed me in—he couldn’t stay though.”

“Saeran,” Nari sighed, seemingly with relief. She paced to the edge of the stage, greatly startling him with the idea that she might fall, but she sat down and let her legs dangle over the side. “I’m glad it’s you. I was frightened that some stranger was listening to me or maybe I was in the way here.”

He relaxed at the sight of her easy smile, slowly pacing over to her. “Where is Mai?”

Nari quirked an eyebrow. “You know I don’t bring her everywhere, right? Or perhaps, she doesn’t bring me everywhere. I brought my stick today; my roommate Duri is home all day to look after Mai.”

“Oh,” he stated simply, stopping a few feet from her and staring up at the high ceiling awkwardly. Carefully placing her violin into its case with wandering hands, Nari picked up a few sheets of thick paper that had markings he didn’t recognize. _Braille._ As she read, she continued to make some conversation in the empty space he provided with his silence.

“What brings you here?”

Saeran blinked at her, admiring the way her top hugged her shoulders and waist with its gray patterned fabric, the wide neckline exposing the healthy jutting of her collarbones. “Yoosung forgot to print off a project.”

“That was kind of you,” she said with a grin, dark eyes flickering slightly. He sometimes wondered if she could see bit of light or if she could detect shapes but, Mina had told them that Nari was completely blind. He shrugged at her on instinct, but before he could scold himself for the stupidity, her voice bubbled low with a soft giggle. “Don’t be embarrassed, I can hear your breath from here.” Saeran let out a surprised huff, and Nari laughed again, this time a bit shorter. “I got your text, by the way.”

“Hm?”

“Lessons,” Nari reminded him, and his face flared up at the memory. She crossed her legs and padded the varnished wood of the stage next to her on the left. _Oh, she wants me to sit_. So he did, carefully. His cheeks burned at the idea of being so close, let alone actually being that close, but insisted he didn’t have the time to think about this. She was inches shorter than him, even while sitting, so he slumped a bit, just to be a bit more level with her eyes. “You want to learn how to play piano?”

“Yeah, a bit,” Saeran replied, slightly non-committal.

“A bit, as in you sort of want to learn, or, as in you only want to learn a little bit?” she inquired, seeming concerned.

There was no way he could lie to such a face. “I—both . . . ?”

Her brows knit together with concern. “If you don’t have a drive for taking this up, you’ll find yourself struggling to maintain and enjoy it. What made you want to do this?”

Saeran fidgeted, not entirely sure how to respond. He couldn’t exactly say ‘I wanted to spend more time with you’ or ‘I wanted to show Saeyoung I can handle being in your presence’. So he went with the next best thing. “I uh . . .” he scuffed his sneaker along the carpet floor below him, tossing his legs rhythmically over the edge of the stage, “Mina wanted to make use of the piano. Aside from when you play, or when Saeyoung taps out weird TV jingles. I think it would make her happy to hear music in the house when she gets home from work. And if she’s happy, then Saeyoung is, and . . .”

“. . . And then you are?”

“Yeah, I guess.”

Nari nudged him a little with her elbow, smiling again. She had to brush off a twinge of warmth coiled in her chest. It impressed her, the way he said that. So admirable. “That’s a very lovely cause, you know. I did something similar when I first picked up music.”

“Really?”

“Well, it was forced first,” she sighed wistfully, chuckling a bit. “Mom wanted something to come out of me, to put my energy to good use. It was annoying at first, but I obeyed her, I wanted to impress her. And then I realized that when I played, it made her happy. It inspired her. And in turn, it inspired me. When she passed away, I felt like all that passed on to me, and I could keep playing through my grief because I knew she was listening.”

Saeran watched her expression carefully. It was a combination of sadness and fondness on her soft features, and she ran her fingers through the front of her feathery black hair. “Wow,” he muttered, turning his head forward, not really sure how to add to that. She was so determined, but so careful. There was no way he could comprehend the loving relationship she had with her mother, but he had his fair share of grief. It was such a different kind of grief. Grief from a long string of hurt, not the loss of the good. “You sometimes,” he paused, figuring out how to word it, “talk about your mom like she’s still around.”

“Sometimes,” Nari purposefully hesitated the same amount as him and took in a breath, “I forget she’s gone. It wasn’t that long ago, now that I think about. Shortly before I met Mina.” Another long inhale and exhale, and he watched as the air passed between her soft pale lips. “I want you to love music, Saeran. I want you to enjoy playing it like I enjoy it. And I hope I can help you with that.”

Saeran blinked at her. “Thank you . . .” Eying her violin in its felt case, its chocolate and glossy surface reflecting back at him. “Could you play again?”

“Wha—oh, yeah, sure,” she stuttered, wrapping her slender fingers around the neck and bow. Luckily, she was right handed, so he wasn’t in the way when she placed the small instrument on her left shoulder. From this angle, Saeran could trace his gaze along the graceful curve of her neck, but quickly destroyed those distracting thoughts. “Wait,” Nari said suddenly, returning the violin and shifting herself further into the stage to push her legs under and standing back straight on the stage. He blinked, watching carefully as she walked over to the piano and waved out in front of her to find the edge of the keys.

“What are you . . . ?”

“C’mon, sit next to me,” she called, briskly playing out a quick few scales expertly, filling the room with swollen smooth melody. As he followed behind her timidly, she began playing out a simple song in a minor key; it was wistful and lulling, and Saeran watched her face carefully as he approached the piano. Nari had closed her eyes and appeared to have briefly lost herself in the piece, her body swaying with the movement of her hands.

He lingered at the edge of the seat, placing his slender strong fingers over the fake ivory keys on the lower end, but didn’t press into the chords, simply skimming the smooth surface gently as he listened to Nari play. “It’s okay, I don’t bite,” she mentioned softly, making him jump slightly. She didn’t falter in her casual performance, even while occasionally hitting the wrong note, simply carrying on as if nothing was happening.

Saeran took a seat without making a sound or vibration and trailing his gaze after the movement of her fingers. He noticed which chords sounded best together, how a pause could add tension—then suddenly she started playing slower, as if she knew what he was doing and wanted him to catch every detail.

“How much do you know about music? Music theory, I mean,” she inquired.

Saeran swallowed. “I’m not sure what that means,” he admitted, an embarrassed heat tinging the edge of his skin.

Nari smiled with a hint of melancholy. “I see.”

She was disappointed, he realized. _She’s disappointed in me._ “What? I was never taught this stuff,” he hissed out a bit poisonously.

“I didn’t say it was a bad thing,” she retorted, though not meanly. It was an assertive tone, and Saeran guessed she was a bit annoyed at his aggressive reaction. “Don’t worry, it just means we can start you off right. Music theory is a lot like simple math, actually. Simple, applied math. You’re a computer science person, so I’m sure that you understand how sound files work. Music theory is just like . . . the macro version of that.”

“Really,” Saeran mumbled, trying his best not to sound a bit bored. Honestly, he didn’t know how to feel around this girl. One minute she was interesting, and the next she was . . . a little irritating, if he was honest. So kind and careful it was annoying.

Suddenly she stopped playing. Her body slowly turning a bit towards him, and her expression was almost strained. Nari seemed . . . sad. A pensive, thoughtful kind of sad. Like she was trying to figure something out and was mournful of the conclusion. “I’m—no, I won’t apologize,” she decided.

“What?”

“Look, I don’t know everything you’ve been through. And you don’t know the things I’ve been through. But you want to learn music, and for very good reasons, as we discussed before.” Nari hesitated, dragging in a breath and then letting it seep out between her lips again. Her eyes were aimlessly cast down. “I naturally have a slightly brash personality. I like challenging people, and I like understanding them. I got into this music program because I worked twice as hard, and I love it, even though I didn’t love every second of the journey. But the world didn’t want me to be brash. I apologize a lot, I do my absolute best to be polite and kind—but to be honest, sometimes I don’t want to be polite. Sometimes I just need to be rude to get a point across.”

Saeran smirked a bit. “Destroying my respiratory system . . .” he said, recalling their conversation at Jumin’s penthouse.

Nari nodded, grinning at the memory. “I don’t regret that, you know. You see, I think I figured something out about you, Saeran. You don’t respond to strings of apologies and fake politeness. You want a person’s thoughts, you want reality, and you want to cut the bullshit.” It was still so odd to hear Nari swear like that. “So if you want me to teach you, I won’t pretend. Am I disappointed you don’t know music theory? No. Am I pissed that you won’t tell me you’re bored? Hell yes. Tell me. I want to cut the bullshit as much as you.”

There she was—the girl who scolded him for smoking and asking her stupid questions. Saeran’s smile grew wider. “Does this mean you won’t be kind?” he asked smugly.

“Of course I’ll be kind. Kindness isn’t a chore for me, when it’s with you,” she said quickly.

_When it’s with you._

Saeran swallowed again, dry this time.

“Now,” Nari continued, straightening towards the keys. “Watch my hands. You will need to learn to read music at some point, but we can start by ear for now—”

“Oh I know how to read music,” Saeran interrupted quietly, his tenor voice cutting through crisply.

She paused. “Oh. Eh, good. Sorry, I made an assumption.” She cleared her throat, clearly trying to revaluate what she was going to explain to him. “Okay, that makes things a little easier.” Her face was a bit blank, but cutely thoughtful. “We’ll still go by ear until I can dig out my beginner music for you. Here, place your hands on the keys like I am. Imagine your hands resting on a bubble, and your fingers are curling around it—”

She reached out to his end of the keys and found his hands, their pale skin meeting warmly as she inspected his position. He flinched, drawing back slightly, and immediately regretted it. He couldn’t tell if it was natural or if it was just because it was her. _God, I can’t even sit still when someone barely touches me._ To his surprise, she didn’t say anything, just froze, and waited for him to be comfortable enough to return and continue. No words, no change in expression, just waiting like it was one more thing in her day. She treated it like it was normal. That’s right. _I don’t know what you’ve been through, and you don’t know what I’ve been through,_ she said. With Nari, everything was fine.

He placed his hands against the keys again. Her touch was careful, but not excessively gentle. She was serious when she said she was done pretending. Before, it would have been stupidly soft in a don’t-make-waves kind of way. He wondered why she usually tried so hard to stifle and smooth out everything to become this innocent, meek persona. Polite in the perfect child kind of way. Who was she trying to impress? Was it because she was blind? Maybe the way she was raised? Perhaps a combination. But now, it was a genuine, authentic guidance between teacher and student. Between friends.

_Right, friends._

“My hands are going to smell like nicotine after this,” she mentioned in passing, finally letting go after being satisfied with her modifications of his hand position.

Saeran snorted with slight humour. “I told you I was cutting down.”

“How many darts a day?” she challenged, disbelief causing her lips to curl upwards.

“About five,” he returned. “It’s actually really hard not to go over that. There are days when I want to smoke in the bathroom with the fan on so Mina doesn’t catch me.”

“Better than dying of lung cancer,” Nari added.

“Harsh,” Saeran scoffed. “Anyway, I don’t expect you to understand.”

“Don’t go assuming,” she sighed, playing out another scale rather quickly. “Not cigarettes,” she continued, suspecting his question. “It’s a long story. My point is, everyone has their demons.”

“Some have bigger demons.”

“It’s hard to quantify. Now, you were watching me before, and you know how to read music. Play two notes, one for each hand, that you think will harmonize.”

As it turned out, Saeran was very observant. Nari knew he was quite intelligent, but he absorbed and implemented her direction so quickly she could hardly keep up. Within half an hour, they were playing a very simple duet together. He was a natural: focused, interested, and maybe it was all the typing he did all day, but his movements across the keys were graceful for a beginner. Most importantly, Nari could feel him tilt slightly in his seat when their duet was timed well. He was _into_ it, and it was . . . oddly attractive. So quiet, but judgemental and precise when he did talk. Though, she suspected he put up a tougher face with the others around.

Once finished, Saeran patiently waited for Nari to tuck away her music in her bag and click the black violin case closed, and they paced comfortably down the quiet hallways towards the elevator. Saeran was rather mesmerized with the sleek, pendulum-like rhythm of her walking stick swaying just in front of her steps. The black strands of hair bounced against her forehead as she strut forward confidently, and she smiled softly at the sound of his scuffing, lazy steps across the tile floor.

“Yoosung knew about where you practice,” Saeran noted rather monotonically. It wasn’t a question, but he was expecting an answer.

Nari shrugged and blushed a little. “Oh . . . yeah. It was happenstance at first; he and his friends came into that little lecture theatre to have some fun. It’s almost never in use, that’s why I practice there. After that he seemed fond of coming in to listen to me play after a test or assignment. Said it calms him down.”

“I’m sure he did,” Saeran returned rather quickly, a hint of annoyance lacing his otherwise bored tone.

Nari quirked a brow. _“Penny for your thoughts?”_ she asked in English, carefully enunciating every syllable with a grin.

Saeran smirked. “My thoughts are worth more,” he said smartly.

She let out a sharp quick giggle, and Saeran almost delighted in the sound. “Shame. Well, you’d have to go to the exchange office anyway.”

“Yoosung,” Saeran continued, taking a pause to choose his words wisely, “has a weakness for kind women. He is blind to the faults in people like you.”

“Pun intended?” Nari asked in good humour. “I’m aware that he is fond of me, but I don’t think it’s serious.”

He didn’t reply, but made a disapproving confirming hum, shoving his hands in his pockets.

 “You’ll be taking the 47 home, hm?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. My house is closer than yours, mind keeping an eye out for me?”

“Um . . . sure .”

The bus, of course, was absolutely packed. Yay for lunch rush hour. Saeran was almost shaking with the responsibility of getting Nari on there in one piece. They were squished between hoards of students ignoring the world with headphones in and some elders seated from previous stops. One older gentleman offered Nari a seat after seeing her walking stick, but she insisted against it, saying she had young legs and could hold onto the nearby supporting bar just fine. So instead, they were situated snuggly against their neighbours, facing each other as the bus creeped forward once again.

Saeran was hyper-alert, watching to make sure Nari was relatively at ease and no one was going to bump into her. He couldn’t help the feeling of protectiveness for his friend. She wouldn’t break, he knew that, but someone who couldn’t see something coming deserved to be shielded. He had to lean in slightly to hold the support bar next to her, tilting in and away as the bus came up to stops. Some of the male students near them cackled with a muffled joke, and he instinctively stepped further to cocoon Nari even more. Saeran looked down at her; she was clutching her stick rather tightly to her chest and her ears and cheeks were tinted a bit pink. He wondered if she could sense his concern for her.

The bus halted roughly for a red light, pitching most of the standing passengers forward. A scattering of startled cries and apologizes mumbled about as everyone straightened out again, but Saeran was more captured by what was happening right in front of him. His reflexes were naturally quite good, but when Nari stumbled forward it was inevitable for her to fall right up against him. Her eyes flickered upwards towards his face as they both gasped at the contact, and she seemed to linger by his body as if waiting to see if the bus would stop again. Or perhaps . . . no, he was imagining it. Regardless, his surprised gaping expression burned at the touch of her torso and hands along the chest of his sweater.

Nari cleared her throat, muttered an apology, and lifted herself back up and away from him, her small fingers sliding down his waist as she did so. Saeran swallowed hard and tried to pretend that it didn’t run a tingle down his spine. _God, she’ll be the death of me._ Realizing that she had fallen into his body between the sweater and his open jacket, his blush deepened further at the idea of how intimate that seemed. He felt ridiculous.

The elderly man who offered Nari a seat caught Saeran’s intense green gaze, matching it with his own shrew-like brown glint, and chuckled to himself, the crow’s feet digging into his cheeks. _Ah, youth._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to comment suggestions or tell me what you like about this little series so I can keep doing it!
> 
> Also, would you like smaller, more frequent chapters, or longer, less frequent ones?


	6. Ask Me Again

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hm, exams coming up. Might be a little while since you see me again.

“So let me get this straight,” Duri relayed, looking up from her phone to watch Nari pull every book out from her shelf and skim over the braille titles. The older medical student had a rare break from studying, which meant she needed to catch up with everything in her roommate’s life. She was rubbing Mai’s belly on Nari’s bed as the young musician filtered through her piano instruction books. “So you’re part of this group for a few weeks, and you’re already performing at their fancy party in a couple of months, and teaching one of them piano? I thought you quit piano a few years ago.”

“I did, but I still practice once in a while,” Nari returned, pressed her fingers along the title of the beginner’s book. “Ah, here we are. Does this have note music with the braille?”

Duri reached over to grab the manual and flipped through it. “Yup. You should give him the simple folk songs book, too. It’s the next one.”

“Thanks,” Nari chirped, snatching it up and replacing the other moved books. “By the way, I’ve know Saeran for as long as I’ve known Mina and Saeyoung. He’s very quiet most of the time . . . but this is a decent opportunity to get to know him better.:

“Judging by that chatroom app, he’s pretty hot, too,” Duri mused. Nari made a noise somewhere between a snicker and a scoff. “To be honest I’m glad you have a social life these past few months. You used to shut yourself away with nothing but music and Mai for company.”

Nari shrugged, pretending it didn’t bother her much. “It’s helped me heal after mom left.”

Duri paused, giving her friend a sympathetic look that wouldn’t be recognized. The young musician was sitting on the floor by the bookshelf staring into her own darkness as her fingers skimmed the edges of the texts in her lap. Duri knew better. She knew Nari didn’t want to burden anyone with her strife.

“She meant so much to you,” Duri sighed, careful with her words. “How are you holding up?”

Nari was quick to respond at first. “I’m—” She halted at the word _fine_. _No, not fine._ “I’m better. It helps to have friends again. And music isn’t a distraction anymore. It helps me deal with it. Come to terms with it. With what happened.”

Duri went into ‘protective medical mama mode’. “You’ve had trauma, you know. It’s okay that it’s hard.”

“Yeah, I know. Honestly, it’s better. I still sometimes think it’s my fault, somehow, but I knew it’s not true.” She smiled to herself. “Saeran, he’s been through some things, too. Worse than me. Him and Saeyoung. And Mina, she’s so warm-hearted and honest. She doesn’t have time for beating around the bush and avoiding things. We all drift towards her genuine personality.”

“Be careful that you don’t like being around them for only that reason,” Duri observed.

Nari’s brow furrowed, her eyes flickering a little. “You know, Saeran said he wanted to learn music because he knows his brother and sister-in-law will like it. He wants to contribute to his family’s happiness. I really admire that. I told him it reminded me of how I always wanted to do that for my mom. Do you think I’m doing this because I feel I’ve failed her?”

Duri thought silently for a moment, listening to their breathing and Mai’s happy tail-wag against the covers of the bed. “Did you feel happy telling him that, or did you have an empty ache you felt you needed to fill?”

Nari smiled again, and Duri watched the pleasant curves of her sweet oval face. “I felt happy. For him.”

Duri gave a soft grin to herself and nodded. “That’s good.”

“Yeah,” Nari replied simply, also holding back a wide infectious grin as she recalled her first lesson teaching Saeran. His fingers were so slender and long, graceful in their movement. After bumping into him during that bus ride, she noticed how most of him was like that. Lean and long—they weren’t unlike in body type, though he was much taller and her hips a little wider. She always disliked her boyish and short figure; there was no running away from society’s expectations, even if you couldn’t see. She ran her hand through her feathered bangs and swallowed the warmth of a blush rising up into her face. There was something ensnaring about wrapping one’s arms around a narrow waist, the sloping curves of the person’s sides and their radiating heat almost gravitational.

 _Perhaps I’m just lonely_ , Nari decided, shaking herself from such ridiculous and fruitless thoughts.

“When’s the next lesson?” Duri asked, her voice piercing through her roommate’s brain.

“AH-um . . . couple of days,” Nari returned, lifting off the floor to place the books in her bag by the door.

Duri watched her friend move across the room and stretch with a yawn. “How formal is this teacher and student dynamic?”

“Ha-aaaaauuuu-ardly,” Nari continued through her loud yawn. “I think of it as just a friend helping out a friend. And I think he does, too.”

“Oh good, so it won’t be awkward if you guys bone,” she remarked.

The young musician reddened madly and made a sharp, exasperated wheezing noise. “Duri! Don’t be gross.”

The older student laughed cheerfully. “What? If you’re into girls, then just say so already!”

“Ehhh,” Nari whined, tilting her head to the side. “I dunno about that. But Saeran is so quiet and brilliant and dark-humoured—”

“And smokin’,” Duri added in a sultry teasing tone. “I may not be interested in men, honey, but I know when one is nice to look at.”

“—sure,” Nari sighed. “Regardless, I doubt he’s interested.”

Duri grinned wolfishly. “But if he was . . . ?”

Nari grew warm again and rolled her head to the other shoulder, an awkward smile plastered on her face. “I guess he’s my type.”

“Glad you’re not in denial,” she laughed again. “If he doesn’t fall for you, he’s gay.”

“Don’t be mean,” Nari scolded softly. “Him not being interested isn’t dependent on that.”

“Just trying to be encouraging. Don’t worry, you are very pretty for us stupid seeing-people.”

“Th-thank you. Anyway, we’ll see,” Nari breathed, deflating slightly. Thinking about this made her brain delightfully fuzzy. She kept replaying that moment on the bus in her head. _Was he uncomfortable? Or just as flustered?_ A smile crept back onto her face again as she dared to wonder if affection was reciprocated.

“Don’t swoon,” Duri reminded, playing with Mai’s floppy black ears.

Nari exhaled roughly and stomped over to her desk. “I am not.”

“Sure, sweetie. Keep telling yourself that.”

 

◊◊◊

 

“She’s teaching you piano?” Yoosung exclaimed, a little loud as he pitched his body in sync with the movement of the console controller. He couldn’t even look at Saeran as he dodged a lightning bolt and sand-surfed between a giant mechanical elephant’s legs. Yoosung was very involved and adrenaline was high, but Saeran watched from the other end of the basement couch in a casual slouched position. It was a bit fun to watch his friend die over and over.

“Yeah,” he confirmed, fidgeting a little as he remembered Nari’s gentle face beside him, playing a simple duet together and enjoying the sound of the old piano. “She’s easy to learn from.”

Yoosung huffed in frustration as Link rag-dolled into the sand on the screen. He pushed against the back of the sofa and locked his lilac gaze on his friend with an awkward smile. “I’m a little jealous, to be honest. She’s so kind and fun to be with.”

Saeran rose an eyebrow but was careful to keep his actual thoughts from showing. “You _like_ her?”

Yoosung glanced away and shrugged bashfully. “I dunno. I suppose? What’s not to like?”

Saeran had to keep his burning possessiveness at bay. He was naturally possessive, but always managed to curb those thoughts. Right now, it was more of a chore. _I knew he had a thing for her. He deserves her more than I do. She deserves someone sweet like him._ It was hard to admit it to himself.

“Do you?”

“Hm?” Saeran hummed, snapping his minty gaze back up.

“Do you like Nari?” Yoosung asked again, his face still friendly, but a little concerned.

The red-head shifted his hips against the couch and pulled at the hems of his full-sleeved shirt at the wrists, eyes cast downward. “She’s alright.”

 _‘Alright’ doesn’t begin to cover it._ He wished he didn’t feel the need to lie, but he did anyway, that all-too-familiar sense of self-preservation kicking in. _Don’t show weakness._ Saeyoung and Mina tried to show him that vulnerability was okay sometimes, but he couldn’t be so relaxed around anybody else. When Nari told him about how she got tired of having to be polite and pleasant all the time, he felt some kinship.

Yoosung giggled. “’Alright’? Saeran, I can read you better than that. It’s pretty obvious you have feelings for her.”

Saeran was losing his patience with this conversation, but he kept his voice low and even. “So what? Gonna fight me over it?”

His friend frowned slightly, then laughed again. “Naw, nothing like that. I’ll admit to a small crush but I’m not head over heels like you.”

“Play your damn game,” Saeran retorted, though there was a bit of playful humour in his tone. As Yoosung agreed and did just that, Saeran pulled out his phone and opened the RFA app. Nobody was online at that moment, but he found a mindless pull and accessed Nari’s account page. Her picture set him at ease every time he saw it: a soft black and white image of her profile under and blossoming tree, skin and hair dripping large raindrops with a downcast expression. He wondered who took the photograph and told her it was worth regular use. Maybe a friend?

He was startled into reality from his phone buzzing in his hand.

_RFA: direct messages_

_Nari_

                _Hi there :3_

Saeran paused to stare at it for a couple of heartbeats. _What are the odds? Wait, what should I say back? Don’t overthink it._

_Saeran_

_Oh hey_

There was a long pause. He glared at the screen for a bit, wondering if he was being too off-standish. Perhaps she was doing something and couldn’t answer right away. Wait, voice recognition sometimes took a little while. _That must be it._

 

_Nari_

_Found some beginner’s book for you. I’m looking forward to the next lesson. You’re a natural. ;)_

He couldn’t help but grin a bit, and Yoosung glanced at his friend’s pleased expression.

 

_Saeran_

_Thank you. I like playing a lot._

_Nari_

_Just wait till you get a challenge. Sometimes love is a lot of work._

“I can only imagine who you’re talking to,” Yoosung teased, vigorously beating the buttons on his controller as he continued to battle the ancient beast on the big screen of the TV.

“Shove off,” Saeran returned amusedly, a shy smile glued to his slender pale face.

 

_Saeran_

_Judging by how Mina and Saeyoung interact, that sounds accurate._

_Nari_

_Harmless play-fighting, those two. I’m sure a real quarrel happens once in a while?_

_Saeran_

_Yeah I’ve heard them yelling at each other upstairs once or twice. It’s awkward for about a day and then one of them breaks and makes up._

_Nari_

_Aw, how sweet. It’s nice for you to have such a good example of a healthy relationship. My roommate Duri and her girlfriend are my model to aspire to._

_Saeran_

_You’ve never been in a relationship?_

He regretted sending that immediately. Who was he to ask such a thing? It was rude and invasive and—

 

_Nari_

_Not really. Not anything serious, anyway. >.<_

_You?_

_Saeran_

_Nah._

_Until recently, I don’t think I was capable. Not healthily._

_Nari_

_“Can’t be a two till you’re a complete one”?_

_Saeran_

_Pretty much._

_So . . . Duri has a girlfriend._

_Nari_

_Getting curious?_

_It’s alright if you want to get something off your chest, I’m not judgemental._

The young man blinked rapidly, and his thumbs moved fast.

 

_Saeran_

_No, no. I’m not._

_Nari_

_Not what?_

_XD_

_Saeran_

_Not gay_

_Nari_

_Yes, I got you. I bear no personal preference, if you’re wondering._

Apparently, she could read his mind. Well if that wasn’t attractive, he didn’t know what was.

 

_Saeran_

_What a strange conversation_

_Nari_

_We’re getting to know one another. Is that so strange between friends?_

_Saeran_

_I suppose not_

_Nari_

_Here, I’ll ask you a question. What are your hobbies?_

_Besides video games and now piano, of course._

_Saeran_

_. . ._

_I like sketching. Usually in black pen or pencil_

_Nari_

_That’s lovely. You’ll have to describe some of your drawings to me sometime :)_

_Saeran_

_They’re . . . not always nice. I sometimes use it to get my negative thoughts out._

_Nari_

_That’s okay. Sometimes those are the most beautiful and thought-provoking._

_You know, my mother was a photographer, when she wasn’t working._

_She loved taking pictures of me._

_I can understand why,_ Saeran thought fondly. He couldn’t be bothered to check his mind, considering the profile image again.

_V . . . V was a photographer._

_No, don’t think about that._

He clutched his phone reflexively.

 

_Saeran_

_So what about you? Anything besides violin and other music?_

_Nari_

_School leaves little room for that sort of thing, but I do read a fair bit. It also enjoy writing poetry, though it’s usually through the computer._

_Mum always loved it. “Wise words from the enlightened young,” she said._

_Saeran_

_Can you tell me how she died?_

Saeran glanced at Yoosung’s progress. His friend was focused on a different task now, still among the Amazon-like desert women of the video game. _She isn’t answering. Did I go too far? Is it too soon?_ He of all people knew how triggers could affect so much. Especially in grief.

 

_Nari_

_Saeran._

_Ask me again at the end of our next lesson._

_I promise I will answer._


	7. {Author's Note}

I'm coming back to this.

Don't worry.

I will be back. I just have two other fics to finish, then this will get back on track.

In the meantime, thanks for your patience and your interest :)


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